ibeachalot's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Blughhsggheblugh.... Hmmmm.... what should I write about today? It's snowing again. Not enough to close schools or anything, but enough that I shouldn't go out today. I really need to get a few things from the store, but not if it's snowing. Kevin assures me that he plans to get the wipers fixed on the van soon. It'd be nice to be able to drive, no matter the weather. I went to Sam's yesterday for some things, major thrill. I was chewing gum while I shopped. I'm not very polite with gum, I admit. I popped a rather large bubble, more as a form of amusement for the kids than for myself. A man walked by and said, "That was very unladylike!!" My "ladylike" reply? "Fuck you" It's not like it was the frickin' opera or something. It was Sam's, for Chrissakes. Don't worry. The kids didn't hear me using profanity. Jameson was in the process of running down the aisle at the time and didn't hear a thing. So please don't give me a hard time about swearing in front of my kids. They know all the words anyhoo. They could probably teach me a term or two. We've decided to wait a couple of months to buy a new car. We want to see what the war situation ends up being. We're going this weekend to test drive an Envoy. It's the only thing I remotely like that has third row seating and isn't a van. I was really hoping for a Lexus RX300, but it only has one row of back seating. Kevin gets a major discount on any GM car, so that'll help. He seems to think we could get an Envoy for about $20,000. There are other vehicles I like better, but... we'll see. I may drive it and fall in love with it. I wasn't crazy about my Saturn when I first saw it either. Then I drove it. I'm really upset about something. I have tried with all my might for eighteen years to be a friend to someone, or at the very least, be civil with her. My attempts have failed miserably and she has repeatedly treated me like shit. I would have abandoned my efforts, but there was a third party involved and I foolishly thought that it would be best for everyone involved if we all got along civilly. Even after all these years and all that's happened, this person continues to treat me hatefully. I'm talking about Kevin's ex wife. I thought about keeping this information strictly in my locked diary, but I don't care anymore who sees it. Sometime, maybe tomorrow, I'd be happy to give you the entire history of our relationship with her and allow you to see what she's put us through all these years. Judge for yourself why I feel how I do. Just when I thought she and I could be friends, she stabs me in the back again. I'm sick of it. I no longer feel sympathy for her. If she's truly dying of cancer, and lately I have my doubts (I'll explain why another time)... well. What can I say. Maybe this planet will be a better place without her venomous hatred. Sorry if that sounds cruel, but I honestly think some people don't deserve to be taking up space. I have made every attempt to open my heart and home to her and she treats me like dog shit stuck to the bottom of her shoe. I'm finished with it and with her. May she rot in hell. Sorry to be so cheery today. I'm sure some of it has to do with the fact that I've slept like shit for the past three nights. I just feel taken advantage of and abused and I'm sick of it. I really don't have much else to write about today. Sorry this isn't more exciting. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day. 9:06 a.m. - 2003-02-06 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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