ibeachalot's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Welcome to My 1993 Finally... 1993. I rang in 1993 as a 26 year old. Kevin and I were living in our house in Camarillo, and we were preparing to put it on the market. Looking back, I think that selling that house was the single biggest mistake we ever made. We were having a difficult time financially and thought selling was our only solution. Kevin�s salary had been cut by 40% and we were basically living two paychecks down the road. I was feeling homesick for Missouri and wanted, more than anything, to move back. Kevin had been here visiting the year before and loved it. He agreed that we could build a better life for ourselves in the simplicity of the midwest. *Snort* We painted the house, inside and out, hung new shutters, cleaned the carpets and laid new vinyl in the bathrooms and kitchen. The house was model home perfect. We priced it to sell and waited for the offers to come pouring in. They didn�t. The market was horrible. Even if we had gotten our asking price, we would barely make enough to rent a moving truck and put a deposit down on a rental in Missouri. I loved that house. Yes, it was small (1164 square feet), old (built in 1957) and it was impractical (you had to walk through the kitchen to get to the master bedroom), but I loved it just the same. The backyard was spectacular! It was lined with fruit trees, had a big covered patio and was totally private. The front yard sloped towards the street and, on clear days, overlooked the Channel Islands on one side. On the other side, you could see the snowcapped mountains and the houses built into the hill. Today that house is worth almost $300,000 - twice what we paid for it. If we had just held on a little longer.... but we felt we had no choice. In addition to wanting to move here, money was so tight, we were taking cash advances from credit cards to pay the minimum payments due on the other credit cards. We were writing bad checks to grocery stores in order to eat. I was having garage sales every weekend, selling off our furniture in order to buy clothing and food for us and Matt, who was living with us every other week. I had been doing home day care and loved it. I made awesome money but even that wasn�t enough to keep us afloat with Kevin�s salary cut. After listing the house for sale in February, I gave notice to all my day care parents so they could make other arrangements for their children. One parent, Debbie B, left her daughter Shelby, age one, in my care up until the last day we lived there. I loved that little girl! Debbie and I remain good friends today. Another day care child, Eric R, age two, was another favorite of mine. He was the sweetest little boy! He had dark brown hair and sapphire blue eyes. I remember his last day... he walked down my front steps, turned to me with tears in his eyes and said, �Bye Bye Miss Winda... I wuv you.� I felt a knife in my heart like I had never known. I think he is why I have such a fondness for little boys! I made selling our house my full time job. Whenever a Realtor called for a showing, I would do a thorough cleaning, light a fire in the fireplace and have something baking. This gave it a �homey� feel. Everyone who looked at the place loved it (or so they said) but no offers came. Kevin was eager to get here to Missouri. He wanted to continue racing or at the least, work for a race team. We had heard that a race driver name Terry W. lived in St. Peters. For shits and giggles, we looked him up in the St. Louis phone book I had swiped from a hotel room on our last visit here. Terry was listed! Kevin picked up the phone and called him. Three hours later, Kevin had a job offer as crew chief on an ASA car. Terry bought plane tickets for us to come out and visit and look for a house. We flew back and Kevin got his first taste of Missouri winter. He loved it. He had never seen snow. We looked around at some houses and were stunned at how inexpensive everything was. I found a house in my old neighborhood that we feel in love with. It needed alot of work, so we made an offer substantially less than the asking price of $89,000. The real estate agent listing the property threw his pen down and disgustingly told us he wouldn�t even present an offer so low. We left. I still laugh when I think about this... the house sat for sale so long that we went home, sold our house and had moved to another place long before that place sold. When it did, it sold for $10,000 less than our offer. I always wanted to find that prick Realtor and ask him if wishes he had entertained our offer when he had a chance! ROFL! We came back home and shortly thereafter, sold our house. We were deflated at how little we got for it. It was only about $10,000 more than we paid for it five years earlier. I had been subscribing to the St. Charles paper while living in California. Through the classified ads, I found a place to rent. It was only a few years old, had two big bedrooms, two baths, a basement and a garage. Best yet, it was only $540 a month! A far cry from the $1,500 we were paying in California! We sent in the application and deposit and had the place waiting for us, sight unseen. We said goodbye to our friends, one by one. I still remember my heart breaking as I said goodbye to Larry. He came over and gave me some boxes for packing. He had just moved into a new apartment and still had quite a few left over. As I hugged him good bye, I thought to myself... �Beg me to stay, Larry.� He didn�t. I watched his black Mustang drive down my street until I couldn�t see it anymore. It was then that I had second thoughts about moving. They were short lived, however. I was excited about starting a new life somewhere else. I was happy to be going �home�. My parents came up and had dinner with us our last night there. We said our goodbyes, which were painful. I liked having my parents so close by. Now they would be 2,000 miles away. On March 26th, we pulled Kevin�s truck out of our driveway for the last time. Behind it, was a car trailer containing my Chevelle. A guy we had met through Terry was driving the moving van for us. I felt a lump in my throat as we pulled away, but it was soon followed by the excitement of what was to come. We drove two days straight and arrived in St. Louis the night of the 28th. We checked into a hotel and Kevin immediately went off to work on Terry�s race car. It was a sign of things to come... The next day, we drove to our new place. WOW! We were pleasantly surprised. For never having seen this place, it was incredible. It was a townhouse, three levels, in a really nice area. The bedrooms were HUGE and it had a spectacular kitchen. It backed to common ground, something else Kevin had never seen. We moved right in and felt at home immediately. Kevin got a job as an independent damage appraiser, in addition to his crew chief job with Terry. I went to alot of races with him and worked as a scorer. I soon discovered I didn�t fit in at all with this crowd. All of them, with the exception of Kevin, were alcoholics. All they wanted to do was drink. I got off to a rough start with the team owner when I told him not to smoke around me. He told me he worked for a tobacco company for many years and knew that there was nothing in cigarettes that would make someone violently ill from being around them. I asked if he wanted me to puke at his feet as proof. Needless to say, we never got along after that. The prick. I found a job teaching pre-Kindergarten at Kindercare. I loved it. I met my friends Amy and Chris there. I stayed until November when the politics of it all got to me. I won�t get into it, but suffice it to say that there was a controversy surrounding Chris and a student in her class and she was fired unfairly. I couldn�t stay in a place where a director wouldn�t stand behind her teachers, especially when they proved their innocence. I left to do day care at home, as I did in California. I cared for four kids right off the bat, because they were students of mine from Kindercare. Their parents were just as disillusioned with that place as I was. After they left for Kindergarten, though, I was left with no kids and had no luck finding others. Kevin was making good enough money that I didn�t have to work, so I didn�t perplex about it much. Life was good. We no longer had money troubles and we loved being in a new place. The sweet smell in the air in spring, the warm sunshine of the summer, the changing of the leaves in the fall and the snow of winter. It was all new and we loved it. I felt a freedom of sorts. Late summer, 1993, Terry let Kevin go from the race team. Kevin was disgusted with Terry�s lack of driving ability and felt like his talent was wasted, so he welcomed the chance to leave. He had met another driver, named Tony Roper. He was also from Missouri. We went to a race with him in southern Missouri and something just clicked. I loved scoring for a driver who could actually drive! I didn�t have to cheat to keep him on the lead lap and he treated me with respect, unlike anyone in Terry�s crowd. Tony�s girlfriend, Michele was nice and alot of fun to be around. Kevin was offered a job as Tony�s crew chief and Tony made plans to move to St. Peters to be near Kevin and his car owner, John, who also lives here in the area. As crazy as it drove me to have Kevin away from home so much working for Tony, I'm grateful that we both got to spend as much time as we did with him. Tony�s death in October of 2000 still haunts and upsets us. Matt came to spend time with us after Christmas, as he had over the summer. 1993 was a year of ups and downs. I can�t believe it�s been almost ten years since we moved to Missouri! So much has happened, it�s amazing. It seems a lifetime ago. I'm wearing: pink Old Navy thermal pants and top I'm listening to: "If Wishes Came True" by Sweet Sensation I'm eating/drinking: coffee 9:50 a.m. - 2003-01-30 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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